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Community Costs

6/15/2014

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I love community. I love to be and feel connected to others. My very first blog post was titled " gang of one?" In it I tried to express that for me, I just don't want to live and breathe by myself; I want to move through this life in a gang....in community

Just like it is often easier to do something yourself than to accept how someone else does it, it seems that it might be easier to skip the gang and go it solo.

There surely are people and situations in community that may make us uncomfortable or who do things in ways that don't make sense to us. People may have habits or characteristics we don't like. When I run into these things I wonder if its all worth it.......

I know about all the benefits of community but is the price too high?

And then I see and I know that this cost is actually a benefit. The more diverse my community is, the more valuable it is to me. With diversity comes the opportunity to accept what is and with that real, honest, open hearted acceptance comes the possibility.

Community continually gives us opportunities to expand our boundaries and as they expand they get thinner and thinner like a stretched rubber band. With compassion turned inward (joy)for ourselves we can turn compassion outward.

I have seen and felt my own boundaries stretch and thin out. As I have let go more and more of "things I know" and of fear I just don't need the protection.

I'm looking forward to the day when that band breaks......

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Bat Mitzvah

6/8/2014

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Yesterday I witnessed my 13 year old cousin become an adult in her community through the ceremonial Bat Mitzvah.  It was a wonderful sight to see her take this rite of passage and receive all the benefits of community.  There was no doubt  about the love that was and will always be extended to her as a member of her family, her community, her synagogue.  I was moved to see such a sure foundation laid out for her......and to see her embrace it.  She was reassured in many ways that she is equal to her life.




To know that we are equal to our lives is truly a gift. 




The community I was given as a young adult saw me through many years and although I decided to leave that community and venture into another, I am thoroughly grateful that I have never tried to be without community.  Yesterday I noticed that as I am  moving through my life I am finding that my boundaries of community are widening or.....  becoming blurry.  How exciting it is to me to think that, in truth, my community is nothing short of the whole human family. 




Once again, limitless.......




Yesterday I felt welcome, encouraged, uplifted and supported by the events of the day.  Some may say that it was her community and that I was just a visitor but it seems to me that if I participate, enjoy and feel connected then the boundary disappeared for me. 









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The Biopsy

6/3/2014

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Today I went to the dermatologist to have a patch of skin on my nose checked. Genetically there is a strong possibility of cancer for me so I need to be checked annually. As I pointed out to my doctor the suspicious patch of skin she honed in on a different one. Though she applied the freezing agent to my patch, she asked if she could perform a biopsy on the other area.



I agreed to the procedure and she told me it would be uncomfortable. I responded that I could breathe through it..... I then announced to her that:



You can get through anything with breathing!



She questioned that statement but I insisted that it was indeed true.  Then she said "well..."  in that tone that means lets just agree to disagree.....so I dropped it and we went on.  


Regardless of who believes it, I am here to say that we can get through anything in our individual lives by tuning into our breath and becoming acutely present with ourselves and with our current situation.  It is clear that some of us have more (or less) difficulty or pain to endure but I honestly believe that each of us is equal to our life.  Every one of us is qualified to live the life we are in......and each of us have all the tools gifts and talents we need to accomplish and thrive in our lives. 


Currently, I am using this tool of breath in my quest for unlimited possibility.... in my quest to have unlimited choices....  Although this is still overwhelming to me I am not giving up on the possibility.  And, though breathing through this is way harder that through that biopsy, I am willing to stay the course for as long as it takes.  Having come to understand that compassion is an essential ingredient, I am breathing that in...all day long.  With in-breaths I turn compassion inward to myself; with out-breaths I soften anywhere I can.....and find joy.  


Its good to note that I'm taking my own advise.......


And according to me, I will prevail.   







 








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an honest update

6/1/2014

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Yesterday I wanted to scream!!!!!  Today I'm ready to write.  Its crazy how every breakthrough is followed by a setback... or what looks like a setback to me.  Just a week ago I was sensing that so much possibility and freedom was just on the horizon for me.  I was entertaining the idea of opening up the possible choices I can have to unlimited ..........  I honestly thought something miraculous was about to happen!


As soon as I put up that post, fear began to run its messages in the background of my mind.  Now, these are familiar fear messages and I know that they are false and I have a  method of dealing with them.  (This skill I owe to the amazing book by Dr. Jeffrey Schwartz;  You are Not Your Brain.)  For days I have been talking myself down off of that fear tower and almost have regretted venturing out this far from my conditioned mind.....almost.


Now, on paragraph 3, I'm calm.  Putting my brain activity down here is therapeutic.  


I said I would keep you posted ....... I didn't know then that my first report would be so hard to write, to admit and to accept.  My honest report is that the best I've been able to do is breathe through fear and doubt.  I have needed each and every hour I got to spend on  my mat this week.  And, I can say that I am not giving up.  


It occurs to me that opening up to unlimited is a really big undertaking and I am going to need some time to open up that much.  The thing I need here is compassion.  It looks like bringing compassion to myself in this undertaking is going to be the first step.  Honestly,  that's not surprising because it has been the first step before.   


I read this week that "Joy is compassion turned inward" .   So, I'm adding joy into this process....


........more to come.....
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    Lucy Facer Bernstein

    I am a committed yogi and community member. I believe in the goodness of humankind and that as we discover our ultimate connectedness we can all find peace....within and without.  

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